personalities...

 random collection of me & my personality throughout the years :)

I talk a lot. Well isn't that breaking news ;) I have always been a very outgoing, talkative, and some might even say loud person. My personality has always been that of a social butterfly and you will usually find me with friends talking away and laughing my head off. I am pretty much as opposite of a wall flower as you can get.

The thing about personalities is it is something about ourselves that we can't totally change. With each personality comes advantages and disadvantages, and as we get older we learn more and more about them and how we can try and take the weaknesses in our personalities and make them stronger. 

For example, despite my personality being one usually tied with confidence, and I would say overall I am a very confident person, I can get nervous. I get nervous when meeting new people because I want them to like me. I mean, who doesn't want to be liked, right?

But seeing that I already talk a lot, what do I do when I am nervous?... talk even more. So when that is matched up next to someone who doesn't talk a lot, or someone who lets a more aggressive personality take over, I can end up taking up most of the conversation. It isn't that I want to be the only one talking, but when I am nervous, if you don't start talking as well, I am going to fill that space.

I always expect that the other person is going to start talking as much as me, but that doesn't always happen because we all have different personalities and not everyone is going to do what I do. This is something about myself that I am very aware of and have been since middle school. I try really hard to not do it, but sometimes it happens anyways. At the end of the day there are always things we are trying to work on and improve on ourselves, right?

Usually after we have hung out a handful of times, I relax and am not so hyped up or worried about what the other person thinks of me. Fortunately for me I have surrounded myself with amazing and forgiving people. People who gave me a chance and give me some time and have found that once I relax a bit the talking turns into more listening. I have a group of very dear friends that I could, and have, pour my soul too. We all have different personalities, yet we understand each other and admire the good things in each other which makes it work.

One thing that I have found women do to each other, is criticize each other for the weaknesses in their personalities. Which is ironic because we all have them! I wrote a previous post about our intentions with people and felt this related. If people could just sit back and try to think about a person's intention, and what their nature is, they wouldn't get nearly as offended as people seem to do.

As women (since my readership is about 99.9% women haha) I wish we could be a little more forgiving with each other and realize we are all trying to better ourselves in different areas, and that for the most part, people just want to be friends with you. 

No one is perfect, and I don't expect my friends to be, nor would I want them to expect that from me! But thankfully, if you surround yourself with women and friends who understand that, I think we will find ourselves with people who love us, and uplift us.

I am just feeling really grateful and blessed today for the amazing women I call my friends. For the friends that have been there to support, cry and laugh with me when I needed it.

There is nothing better then a genuine love for another person and wishing them well, and getting that back in return, because that is what true friendship is.


24 comments

  1. I have a very similar personality so I totally get where you are coming from. All I want it for people to like me, which can sometimes make me go to extremes when I am first meeting them. Fortunately though, when you do get to know me, I calm down and I am relatively normal! Thanks so much for sharing this post. It also makes me rethink how I judge other personalities.

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  2. I get nervous when meeting new people. I am an outgoing person but when I am in a group or in a situation where I am meeting new people I get quiet. Once then I start to talk then I normally say something totally dumb. HA HA Once people get to know me then I keep them laughing because I love to kick back and be silly and have fun! :)

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    1. haha exactly, people just need to give each other a chance after they have met a few times, I mean, most of us are super awkward at first right? haha

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  3. I love this post LIKE WHOA.

    And I agree wholeheartedly, m'dear!

    Like you, I've always been outgoing, bubbly and confident, but I also sometimes feel nervous meeting new people. Sometimes I don't, sometimes I do. Just depends how I'm feeling on that particular day, I s'pose.

    It irks me a little, though, when some people don't make an effort in conversation, when it's left to just one person to "carry" the weight in the convo...it's like, hold on a sec, are they gonna let all these awkward pauses happen if I happen to not fill them?

    Hee!

    Espesh if you're constantly asking all the right questions and stuff. You know?

    Also?

    Those pictures are faborama!

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  4. I have the same problem of nervous talking :) My blog

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    1. I am a nervous talker indeed! You should have heard me just before I was about to be put out for my wisdom teeth surgery! haha oh brother...

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  5. I'm almost entirely the opposite! Whenever I'm around large groups of people I don't know I get so shy and quiet! Which ordinarily isn't my personality at all and I always LOVE it when someone more talkative and bubbly comes up and pulls me out of my shell!

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    1. That is the funny thing about personalities. They can change once they are comfortable! I become less loud and talkative when I am comfortable, and quiet people become more bubbly and outgoing when they are comfortable :) Making us all pretty much the same, right?!! haha I love it.

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  6. i love this post. i actually would appreciate having someone like you come up and talk to me! my personality is and always has been a very shy, quiet, incredibly anxious person. I am very very quiet and it is hard for people to get me to talk. But what people don't realize is that I DO want to talk but no one really tries that hard or talks to me all that much to give me much of a chance, they just don't think i want to.

    i think it would be so great if all women could just embrace the good and bad parts of their personalities and those of others and really try to get to know each other before judging. it is part of the reason i love blogging! there are so many different ladies out there and yes blogging has its haters too but there are so many amazing, wonderful women that i have got to "meet" and get to know and i love that we get to all share our stories and personalities with each other in such a cool way.

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    1. LOVED THIS KATIE :) Exactly. Blogging is such a great format to really get to know people, and make new connections. Like I said, most people just want to be friends with you, and I wish people were more open, forgiving, and less judgmental sometimes! Thankfully I have only experienced judgement like that a few times in my life, most people are very kind and willing to see good things in people without trying to point something wrong out.

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  7. I totally agree with Elle ^^. :) Love this post!

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  8. at first, i'm not an outgoing person. and yes, i would appreciate someone who come and talk to me first. sometimes i wish i could be more relax and outgoing.

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  9. I'm normally quiet at first but that's why I appreciate people like you who are a bit more outgoing! Girls are very harsh and it's very sad. I was bullied in school and it was the worse. Have you heard of The Kind campaign? I love what these two girls are doing! I hope you have a great day!

    Xo
    Rachel

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    1. Aw man Rachel, I am sad to hear you experienced stuff like that in high school! Unfortunately, it doesn't always stop there. Girls can be like that even as adults, which is shocking and sad. I will have to look more into The Kind campaign! Thanks for sharing that with me!

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  10. I totally agree! Girls can be harsh to each other, and I know I am part of that group at times. Just last week I posted a silly and almost pointless OPINION- that word is key here- about how I find the printed baby leggings on boys silly and inappropriate. I knew I could possibly recieve backlash, but it's my opinion, why would I care. You better believe, a girl I knew in college comes on and just starts ranting, "Why do you care? People can dress their babies however they want!" Yeah, exactly. Same how we as grown adults can all dress how we want. Exactly the reason I don't wear printed leggings as an adult- I think they are silly, and would scare people with my bootay. Anyways, my rambling point is, a lot of times, people tear each others opinions down, when it is their right to have one. This was MY Facebook wall, not someone elses. It was MY opinion. I try to only give positive comments and advice to people at all times, but this was just so eye opening to me. I mean, I hadn't spoken to her in years, she was just looking for a fight, which is really sad to me. :( Thank you for sharing this. This will help me become a better person and try my hardest to not judge others!

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    1. Loved this! Yes, people need to be less critical of each others opinions for sure. People just need to think about where someone is coming from and what their intentions are and I don't think they would get upset nearly as often if at all!

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  11. Alycia, I was an "overtalker" too and it has taken me years to curb it. I'm now very happy to be quiet much of the time. I talk in my own mind all day long! The long term is.....the toll it will take on your vocal chords! Your voice will be totally raspy by the time you're 40 and beyond! And....the perfect walking partner (which women friends do as they get older) is a 50-50 friend. She talks half the time and you listen, and then you talk half the time and she listens. When you find that friend, (and she has equal leg length for walking!) you've found a lifetime treasure!

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    1. Actually my best friend is like that!! Most of my friends are :) 50/50 fun, laughter, and talking all the time :)

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  12. I 100% agree. I had a mission companion in the MTC who was just laying in to me one day about how I was too chatty that it made us late to things. Anyways that night she asked me to point out her flaws and that's when I realized that we are our own worst critics. As women we are too hard on ourselves and it wasn't my job or my place to make someone feel worse about the insecurities they already have. Thank you for sharing this. It's a good reminder to be kinder to all of those around us as we don't know their intentions or what their going through or their insecurities.

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  13. I am the opposite o you. I am pretty quiet but when I am nervous (aka meeting new people) I tend to let the more "aggressive" person talk.

    It's OK. That is how I like it :)

    XO Lourdes

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  14. Love this! I always enjoy your post where you really share your thoughts!

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