hope all things.


 Trevor gets home next week... and it has me reflecting on the past six weeks.

If you haven't noticed, I haven't been around much on the blog the last little bit. I am going to be honest. I have been having a hard time this past week.

You see, neither Trevor or I are what I would consider "needy." While we enjoy being together, we also appreciate our "me" time. Because of that, I would say we did really great until about the four week mark. You can keep yourself busy all you want, start projects, clean, yadda yadda... 

But there is something sad about living in a place where you know there is supposed to be another person with you.

Separation is inevitable throughout our lives. We spend our youth trying to cling to our parents, while they try and teach us how to be on our own, how to be independent. All with the goal that we will eventually leave our home, and live on our own.

And we do. We start to build lives with other people, and start our own family. Sometimes I think back to my childhood and realize just how special that time was... me and my siblings all under one roof, together, loving and learning. It went by too fast.

Children grow into adults, and now I find myself sharing a life with another person. We are slowly, but surely, building our home and life together. Our little individual family. Trevor and I have never spent more then a few weeks apart since we met, so him being gone for about seven weeks has been an adjustment.

I consider myself a strong person, and I am not saying to be sad or vulnerable is weak, but I was surprised when the other day when Trevor called me, I just broke down crying. I had, had enough. I wanted him home now. The past week I have seen a side of myself that I didn't know existed. I just had no energy to do anything, just letting myself feeling sorry for myself and missing some companionship, and Trevor. Thankfully yesterday I snapped myself out of it... at least for now. I hope I can keep it up... but I wont lie, I am very excited Trevor will be coming home next week. I really can't take it much longer.

Separation in this life is inevitable. We will have to be apart from loved ones sometimes. It is just life. And we will all leave this earth and leave loved ones behind at some point. 

Some say that distance makes the heart grow fonder. I am not sure I completely agree with that. I think it just makes you miss them terribly... haha. I think it can give you some perspective, make you realize what you really have and all that.

But for me, separation instead helps me learn and understand more about hope. Love and hope that we will see our loved ones soon, or even after death. That emotions like pain and suffering can be temporary. That the person who left the dent in the pillow will come back and fill it again. Hope.

I can't wait to have Trevor back.

I choose to hope all things.

 ♥ ♥

p.s. I will not being doing tid+bits this week, but will have a link up next week for sure!

54 comments

  1. For me, the separation is the worst part of military life by far. I hope you have so much joy when the dent in the pillow is finally filled again!

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  2. I don't know how you've been doing it. You're amazing. Also, this is a beautiful blog post.

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  3. that sounds tough - my husband leaves for a week at a time for work and I really don't like it. hang in there!

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  4. Firstly, adorable picture!

    Now on to the next, my fiancé & I have been in a long distance relationship since day one and it's been hard ever since day one but day 100, year 1 & 1/2, and now, it's the ultimate challenge. We will be getting married in August & then the distance will finally come to an end {hallelujah}. I know first hand though how tough it is. And believe me we've tried everything from emails, to cards, to Skype dinner dates and nothing makes it easier. But try and keep that pretty head high and make the most of your time apart and before you know it you will be nestled in his arms again :)

    Thinking of you! xo

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  5. I know how you feel. Hang on! My husband had to leave for 5 months for work. It was really hard but really makes you appreciate one another that much more!

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  6. so so precious. i can't wait for him to come back for you! i hate when aaron is gone!

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  7. It's so hard being away from the one you love especially for a lengthy amount of time. I always love the anticipation of seeing him again though. Even though it hurts being away from him, I love the excitement that builds. It only makes you stronger! Hope this next week goes by quickly for you both!

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  8. I love "Hope". Beautifully written.

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  9. That must be really hard :( The end is in sight though and he will be home soon! Now you can count down the days.

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  10. It really is hard to be away. But isn't is a sweet thing that you can miss and love someone that much? It sounds like you guys have a great relationship.

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  11. I knew when you first blogged about Trevor leaving, this six weeks would be difficult, because I can't imagine how I would do it. Lots of tears for me I'm sure! I'mm so grateful for hope, I think it helps us carry on, when life gets very difficult!

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  12. Hey Lady- we allllll have those days! They're what I've dubbed the "mini melt" and it looks like you beat yours! My husband is also away for the summer until AUGUST 10th. But I do get to see him most weekends... You're so right about it just being weird to be alone in a place that you're supposed to have someone else... it's kinda what makes it a home. Here's to hoping your last week without your hubs FLIES by! Lots of crafting, blogging and all of that jazz!! Love your honesty in this post and the fact that you took a break from the blog when needed, so refreshing!

    Amanda
    It's an Easy Life

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  13. It really does suck. But you've gotten through the thick of it and only have a week left! You can totally do one more week :)

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  14. The longest I've been apart from my Husband is a week...and I missed him. I was definitely ready to be back with him.

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  15. I've haven't seen my fiance for 4 weeks. I miss him terribly. I cried every night knowing that I couldn't be with him for several weeks. At some point I wanted to give up my job here because being away from him gives me pain. But we have to endure that for our future. I am happy to know that you can see your husband again. =)



    http://sassychunny.blogspot.com/

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  16. Hope is a beautiful principle. Loved this post and it's gotten me thinking of my hubs and how much I love him. Thanks, hon!

    J

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  17. hang in there, love! a week will FLY by before you know it. when jay and i were long distance, 4 weeks was our breaking point, too. we would just start fighting for no reason and then would be like: "oh YES! it's week four. that's why!"

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  18. Sweet post Alycia. Hang in there. Not much longer now. I totally understand that hole that's left when the hubby leaves. And realizing just how MUCH you can miss someone. Just shows that you love each other immensely and that is a beautiful thing!

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  19. my husband and i spent four months long distance dating, and then another four months extra long distance engaged. so recently, when he told me that because he's a geology major and in order to graduate, he has to go on a six week field camp trip, i was like "okay, that's a long time but we can handle it..." oh my GOSH it's been a whole three days and i am DYING without him here! (not to mention i live in rexburg... boring haha.) i totally know how you feel. i was thinking about "absence makes the heart grow fonder" and how i think that it just makes you miss them more, but at the same time it makes me realize how much i love having my husband at home. so hang in there, alycia! the end is in sight! :)

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  20. aw, yay for him almost being home. unfortunately, the mister and i are quite needy with one another. i can't go more than a week and a half without him. no fun!
    xo TJ

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  21. So glad you're getting him back soon!

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  22. Me and my man just love being around each other. He recently has been going on business trips and the last one was pretty rough for me. Normally I CAN keep myself occupied but this time I was all kinds of emo. I'm sure it doesn't compare to long term separation but man does it suck! Hang in there hun.

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  23. I'm so glad he's coming home soon, but I'm sorry it's been rough on you! As much as it stinks, you'll get to have all those frilly butterflies in your stomach again when you see him. ;)

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  24. thanks for being so honest with us!
    you know... when you're married, you become literally ONE with that other person. you're meant to be ONE and to have that person gone for so long would be SO hard. Something is gone from your life and that WOULD cause things to be off.
    SO....you're STRONG for even getting this far and it's OK to be sad/vulnerable and even weak. no shame in that! i'm so glad he'll be back next week !!!

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  25. oh girl i totally cant imagine, if anything that whole absence makes the heart grow fonder rings true right!?

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  26. I know exactly how you feel.

    Beautiful words of hope. It's something that everybody should remember while separated from someone they love. It doesn't make it easier, but it makes the return so much sweeter. :)

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  27. Aw...this is so sweet. I'm glad your hubby will be home with you again soon! Distance is hard!

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  28. you'll have him soon! your comment about heart growing fonder made me thing of this quote;

    http://lavitaebella-elisabeth.blogspot.com/2011/06/absence-makes-heart-grow-fonder-but-it.html

    from when ben and i were apart for 5 weeks. not fun at all.

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  29. I love this post. It reminds me that I'm human for being needy at times :)

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  30. I know how you feel - no matter how strong you want to be, that sadness just creeps up! A few months ago my boyfriend was away travelling for work more than he was at home - and being around Christmas time made it even worse I think! But it's sooo good when they get home :)

    Life Etc

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  31. My fiance is in France on a study abroad until July, and this post seriously brought me to tears. I felt pathetic for being as miserable as I am, but I'm appreciative of the fact that you were willing to open up about it and share your thoughts! They have helped immensely, so thank you!

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  32. My husband left me last summer for six weeks, and it was so hard. There were lots of blessings and good times, but it was still hard. At the same time, we now talk about how much we grew from those experiences. While that's not comforting to think about at the time, you're almost done! Good job for sticking it out!

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  33. I'm glad he's coming back soon.

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  34. Love you! I really do.
    And I think you are SO strong, Alycia. I don't think I could do it. When Eric started working up north and I was still stuck in St George I went crazy. We were separated for two and a half months, except we saw each other every weekend. But I still went crazy during the week! I'm so glad he'll be home soon!

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  35. So glad your hubs will be home soon.. I can't imagine being away like that. I've never been away from my hubs, but it would be horrible. You're doing great!! Next week will come so soon :) Keep your chin up, girl! You're almost there!

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  36. I'm so sorry! I know how hard it is! Josh had to go to NM last year for work and was gone for 5 months. It was SO LONG. I only got to see him twice during that time, and they were only for 2.5 days each time. It's amazing how much this time apart will reaffirm your love for one another... you KNOW how much you love one another... but this just really proves how much absence makes the heart grow fonder! So excited for you to have him back next week, whoohoo!!

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  37. (sorry if I commented about this before...)
    Last summer my husband had an internship in CA, but I had to stay behind in AZ because we had a lease and I couldn't just ask my employer to hold my job for 3 months. It was SO hard. It was probably the hardest thing I have ever done. I never want to do it again. And I was definitely not myself and who I wanted to be. I know exactly how you feel, I was lethargic almost and just bummed out a lot. I hated not being my happy self but it was so hard when I felt like I was missing a part of me! I could only fall asleep at night if I watched Netflix on my laptop until I could barely keep my eyes open. If I slept without my ring on I would wake up at 3 am and sit bolt upright from a dream where I had lost my ring and I would have to get out of bed to make sure it was where I had left it. I'm pretty sure all my fb friends hid me on their feed because most of my posts were whiny and depressing,haha. So I totally get it. And I can't blame you one bit. And even though at the time I denied every bit of it "making us fonder" or "stronger" I can look back now (a year later) and see that even though that summer was filled with the hardest and some of the saddest/loneliest times I also get overwhelming feelings of joy when I think about how it felt when I went to visit him on a weekend or when he picked me up from LAX for the last time before we moved him back to AZ. I don't recommend it to other couples and I never want to do it again, but I am grateful to have someone that I missed that much and someone who missed me back and that we have a marriage/relationship where it was hard to be away instead of a relief. And I do feel like it made us stronger and closer as husband and wife. I know it's hard and it doesn't really make it easier to have someone tell you, "well it'll make you stronger!" Cause it still stinks being apart! BUT you're almost done. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. The end is near! You can do it! (cheering you on to make it through the home stretch.)
    Let me know if there is anything I can do for you :)
    annastasiamrich {at} gmail {dot} com

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  38. so beautiful alycia! isn't it incredible what we can learn and how much we can grow in the midst of something that is so unpleasant for us? it's so wise of you to have hope in things through this...bless your heart, you are so faithful!

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  39. Oh girl, I feel for you! Last year we went though a similar thing. I had a semester of graduate school left and my husband was accepted to a program 5 hours away. I started off fine, but it is very weird not having the one person around who you think should always be around. By the time I finally got use to it, it was time to move back in together. I think the boredom was the worst part.

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  40. girl, you are amazing. i could never do that. seriously. you are so strong. i can't wait for him to be there with you :) it will be a great day it indeed.

    K

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  41. What a beautiful and open blog post, Alycia! I love how you shared your thoughts, an I can only imagine how difficult that time apart must be...for you both! I am someone who enjoys my "me time" as well, and love how you said it has made you reflect and even realize how wonderful childhood was...I feel the same way! That said, I love that you discovered hope as well...such a wonderful and inspiring word! :)

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  42. A lovely post Alycia! Focus on him getting home and plan things you can do together.

    Gemma xxx

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  43. That is sad he's been gone for so long. Think though, NEXT WEEK LOTS OF PASSIONATE...

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  44. Separation is hard and terrible in my opinion. My fiance and I aren't needy either. We enjoy our own "me" time... going out with friends and doing whatever. He went away to school for 9 months and it was rough. I cried more than I did my entire life. When you are so use to having your loved one close by, it is hard not to have them there. Even though it was a terrible time, I know our relationship grew incredibly strong because of it.

    Hang in there, he'll be home soon!

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  45. Ok I haven't been around, obviously, but I had no idea! This post really has helped me! Matt is in San Diego for the next 12 weeks, and I've only been one week without him so far (and not even one WHOLE week yet) I know what you mean about being hopeful, and being strong, and not needy. but gosh it's so hard! Hang in there lycia! You get to see him SOOOO soon!

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  46. This post is so beautiful! I sympathize, I've been there, and I just know you are going to feel like it's your birthday/Christmas/New Year's all wrapped in one when your hubby gets back and I'm so excited for you to have that feeling!

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  47. You have a beautiful blog with a lot of inspiring posts! Congrats on your work! Would you like t follow each other?:)

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  48. I love this blog post. I know exactly how you are feeling. I was in Detroit training all last week and missed my hubs like crazy. Hope is wonderful :)

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  49. Being separated from those you love sucks :( I feel silly saying I miss my boyfriend when he's gone for a week, but at least I kinda know how you feel! Hang in there and it will make him coming back that much better!

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  50. Lovely blog post. Being vulnerable is certainly not weak... in fact it shows great strength and character!
    I'm glad Trevor is coming back home - what a reunion that will be :)
    Lovely blog!
    Bailey from Vanilla Blonde
    x

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  51. Oh I am just so happy you get to have him back next week! I know when Gabe is gone my heart doesn't feel right. Hang on tight you are almost there!

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  52. i can't wait for you to see your love again! i just got caught up on your blog. man i've been a bad at reading my favorite blogs lately... i'm glad you made it through those dang 6 weeks. ugh!

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  53. Awe, it's good that you are being honest. Sometimes you just have to put it out there and you'll feel better knowing that everyone goes through moments of weakness. You have a beautiful relationship and I love that you chose hope. Hope all things is just perfect. I hope you are loving having him home.

    http://sincerelyarizona.blogspot.com/

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