(Yes, I am actually in San Diego right now, hanging out with my best friends :) be jealous, the weather is perfect.)
Normally I would do my 30 for 30 post along with my Life Should be a Party post, but today I just wanted to share something along with my new series. I have always been an extremely social person. I am as far from shy as someone could ever get. I am loud, talkative and I always want to be around people. I am a people person. When I moved from San Diego to Utah for college, I was excited to meet new people and get a different experience. A new experience is something I sure got! My freshman year at a very small college in Utah gave me a new taste in life I had never had. In the long run, the small town and small school was just not the right fit for me. I never felt completely comfortable there, and while the people were great, I just didn't feel the connections and clicks that matched the strong group of friends I had back in California. Some of the friends I made at that school still stay in touch, but ultimately we all all went our separate ways, as I transferred on to the University of Utah.
Literally my first week in Salt Lake City I met Trevor. I pretty much hung with him for the next year. I did make some girlfriends in Salt Lake, but they all had "their group" of great girlfriends and friends, and I couldn't help but always feeling like the 5th wheel. But I didn't care so much, I was enamored with my new boyfriend and was having a blast. So at the end of that summer Trevor and I got married, and started our life together as husband and wife. The first year of our marriage I was so focused in my school work and being married, I didn't focus too much on the fact that I hadn't really made any close friends in Utah. I almost feel bad saying this because I have made friends in Utah, some great people! However it just didn't feel comparable to the handful of amazing friends all in San Diego, that I wish I could just call and hang out with and be with again. In the past six months I guess you could say my sparkly, bubbly, friend making personality has taken a turn for the worst. I don't want to say I have been depressed, but I have been having an extremely hard time being away from my friends. I had never seen this side of my personality because making friends and having friends has NEVER been difficult for me, and here I was, having problems with feeling like I didn't have any close friendships outside of my marriage. All my friends were gone, and I felt really alone.
A month or so ago our home teacher came over and gave us a lesson about looking for the good in our lives. He expressed how too often we focus on the bad things, and the things that are upsetting us, that we don't realize all the good things around us. He challenged us to look for the good in our lives. I realized that I had been so focused on missing my friends, I was making myself sad and upset all the time about it when I had so many wonderful things going on in my life. I am not saying that I am 100% better right now. I still miss my friends back home like crazy, and wish I was closer to home to spend time with them. But I have realized that life does go on, and there are new adventures out there for me, and it is up to me to change my state of mind. I have always been good at doing that before, so it has been hard for me to accept that I have let my emotions take over my actions like this. I think this is something I will be working on for awhile, but I am excited to try and enter our new situation of moving to Provo as a fresh new start. I want to try harder to create those friendships and make some life lasting relationships with people around me. I know my friends from California are not going anywhere, and when I come home I can always have time with them. I wish I could have more time sometimes, but I need to focus on the life I have and why I have so much to be happy for.
So here we go my list of little to big things I have been celebrating in my life as of late....
+ having a loving and supporting husband that cares about how I feel.
+ getting to have some alone time with my parents! I have never been alone with them before for over 24 hours, it feels kind of weird but I like it :)
+ having friends that love me and care about me, no matter how much time has passed, and how much distance there is between us.
+ perfect weather.
+ the beauty of the earth. seriously. I went on a run with my parents the other night and the canyons are just breathtaking.
+ summer vacation :)
+ FRESH TANGERINES! yum
+ Pinterest YES, I am going to celebrate Pinterest because I am in love with it haha
+ my parents 30 years ago TODAY getting married in the Cardston temple :)
Oh and here is something for all of you to celebrate.... I realized last Friday I forgot to put an end date on the giveaway post. So lucky for you guys, you all get until Wednesday to still enter the amazing Rainy Day Dangles Giveaway! :) haha